Last time on What The Fuck Is Going On? — Riley had just accidentally revealed a small part of her big secret: Alexa is trans, and apparently, so am I. And now with her cover-up in jeopardy, my towering Amazonian of a roommate is darting around our tiny apartment, trying to cleanse it of any hint of why I woke up as a woman. She’s acting a little…crazy, but maybe we can start slow and gently broach the issue…
“Riley…Riley, will you please just tell me—”
“—You’ve always been a girl!” she shouts, moving to add a desk lamp to her expanding armful of housewares.